Grab a cuppa….we could be here a while!
I should tell you now that this post includes a recipe for some delicious baked eggs, if you would like to skip my moaning and jump straight to the food (I wouldn’t hold a grudge) then click here to go to the lovely Rachel Khoo’s original recipe.
Now, you know me, I’m not one to moan BUT….!
Having been on a rather long journey towards motherhood I’ve managed to tot up a disturbing number of gripes about the subject before, during and after my eggs have finished baking (tenuous food link!).
So, Mr T and I have been married for 8 years this May and have just welcomed our first little bundle of joy, Little Miss T joined us in October and (just FYI) was conceived completely naturally dispite the fact we have been a child-less, married couple for quite a few years.
This childlessness was partly by design and partly due to nature.
My mother passed away (you will know the details from previous posts) the same year that Mr T and I got married. This left us with a huge amount of healing to do but also with a house to sort (hoarder!) and sell on- it eventually took almost 5 years to get through (the house that is) and was such a tiring process that the thought of going through it pregnant/ with a young baby was hard to contemplate and so we kept putting starting a family off until the house was sold despite half-heartedly trying from time to time. Don’t get me wrong, if it had happened for us during this time then we would have been over the moon but it just didn’t.
Even once this obstical was out of the way, making the final decsision to whole-hartedly commit to staring a family took us some time. We love holidays and socialising so we spent a while giving it a go and then when it didn’t happen we just went on holiday and thought ‘oh well, at least we can drink and spend whatever we want without a worry’.
This all changed New Year 2015. We were in Las Vegas living the highlife, sipping beer at 9am whilst popping dollars into the BlackJack machines and we both agreed, that whilst living said highlife was mucho fun, we both wanted more and so Little Miss T’s journey into this world began and my long list of annoying comments began to grow!
Now, I am fully aware that people who make these comments/ do these things are doing so with the best of intentions but STILL……
‘It’ll be you next’ and ‘So when are you starting a family?’– often uttered at a Baby Shower (yet another ‘Americanism’) and/or by older family members!
Who the hell says that we want to be next?! What bloody business is it of yours anyway?! What if we had been trying and going through all of the possible heartbreaks that could come along with it? What if I replied ‘No, actually it won’t be because we don’t want children’, would I then have to go on to answer a barrage of questions and further justify our life choices?
I know these quips are often mindlessly said but just take a moment to digest how someone might feel if they are on the journey to parenthood and suffering the heartbreak of miscarriages or yet another negative test result and here they are having to swallow that down to smile at your throwaway one-liner.
‘You wouldn’t understand’ – a particular favourite said by those WITH children!
Thanks for pointing out our obvious difference and, no, maybe I wouldn’t understand but it doesn’t mean I have to be cut out of the conversation and maybe by listening to these golden nuggets of things that I ‘wouldn’t understand’ I could learn from you ready for that magical time I ‘would understand’.
What really riles me with this comment is the superior air it is usually said with. I know there is a wonderful movement of ‘it-can- be- shit- sometimes- too-ness’ going on at the moment but hey, just because you have managed to have the tadpole crack your egg so to speak, doesn’t somehow make you a better person than me, possibly a more tired person (lets not get into that!) but not a better one!
Yep, so here I was living the pregnant life, thinking all of the crap comments were behind be and BAM….
‘You’re getting big’– a favourite of people you don’t really like!
NO SHIT SHERLOCK!!!!!! I mean, who would say this to a none-pregnant lady????? When did having my egg cracked by previously mentioned tadpoles give people the right to suddenly start commenting on my size? I actually found this quite offensive and those who dropped this particular comment were very lucky that I wasn’t particularly ‘hormonal’ whilst pregnant (Mr T might disagree!) or else I might have bopped them one whilst weeping!
‘You’re bump looks low today’- again, when did I give you permission to comment?! What the F does that mean anyway???? The whole host of Old Wive’s Tales really got under my skin- No, I won’t lie down while you dangle a ring over my stomach!
‘Life will never be the same again’– usually said with a rye smile!
Really? I mean, I thought I would just pop it out, head back to work and carry on as before- no? This was a particular annoyance of Mr T’s because obviously this notion had never occurred to us!
Yep, all of these were annoying but nothing compared to TOUCHING THE BUMP!!!!!!!!!
As with the above comments, would you touch a non-pregnant lady’s belly? HELL NO! I actually tolerated it from family but it was the people who I only vaguely know and who felt the need to touch my belly that really pissed me off- my back would prickle and I would visibly straighten up. Don’t touch without asking and even then….just DON’T!
And the piece de resistance….. ‘Any signs yet?’ or ‘Still no baby?’
If you, like me, went mega over due at all or even if you were close to your due date when your precious bundle arrived the above phrases were like a red rag to a bull! I actually refused to respond to text messages containing them…. my own dad was the worst…. yes dad, I have had the baby some time ago now but I’m just not telling you!!!! At a time when you are climbing the walls waiting for the inevitable to happen you just don’t need the 50 million reminders a day that, yes, you are still up the duff!!!!!
Well, Little Miss T is here and we are well and truly part of the parent club now but does that mean the annoyances stop? HELL NO….. in fact, there’s even more but I’ve chosen just a select few for you today (oh goody!)
‘Is she good?’- asked by everyone and anyone!
She is 4 months old of course she is good! What most people are asking is ‘Does she sleep at night and feed well or is she a cranky, crying baby’ as these seem to be the key indicators of a ‘good’ and ‘bad’ baby! The poor mites are just trying to come to terms with life outside of the womb and already their behaviours are being labelled!
‘That baby needs a dummy’- I’ve found older family members like to offer this nugget of wisdom up the most!
No, my baby doesn’t like a dummy and just spits it out but it’s ok, I know what you’re really saying is ‘get that baby to shut the f*ck up’ nice, real nice!
‘Breast is best’- yes its the NHS line but many people judge you by it too!
I take big issue with this one…. my little darling is still breast fed and won’t take a bottle as she just can’t master the sucking action but, and I stress, BUT I am not a breastfeeding warrior… I honestly and wholeheartedly believe that FED IS BEST! I took great issue with one midwife who pushed and pushed the breastfeeding mantra down my throat- yes, I informed her, I would be trying it and hoping we both took to it but I also had bottles, formula and a pump ready should it just not be right for us and I summed up my polite rebuff with ‘so long as me and my baby are happy and healthy then that’s all that matters’- she went quiet and moved on to the next thing on her list!
I’m sure you have a million more one-liners that have boiled your eggs and I’m hoping many of you are nodding away in agreement with my main gripes (please tell me I’m not just a lonely old nark!) but now onto some yummy cooked eggs that in no way boil my blood….
These are based on a Rachel Khoo recipe (see the top of the page) and came about by nosing in my cupboard at random Christmas leftovers. So, if like us you like a little treat for breakfast at the weekend then these baked eggs in pots (or Oeuf en Cocotte) will hit the spot!
All in all they take about 20-25 mins to prepare and cook (and about 2 seconds to devour!)
Hollandaise Sauce (we had a jar left over from Christmas)
Crusty bread to dip
Paprika (or another spice such as cinnamon if you prefer)
Salt & pepper
Ramekin (1 per person- smooth sided are best)
Dish to make a bain-marie
Place 2 heaped tablespoons of creme fraiche in the bottom of the ramekin and sprinkle a pinch or 2 of paprika on top. Crack 1 egg into the ramekin and season with salt and pepper. Finally add a heaped teaspoon (or more if you wish) of hollandaise sauce on top and place the ramekin in a dish ready for the oven. Add warm water to the dish until it reaches about 3/4 of the way up the ramekin’s side. By cooking in a bain-marie your eggs stand a better chance of gently cooking right through.
Carefully place in the oven and cook at 180 for about 15 mins (my oven is on the cool side so it took more like 20mins). Once you’re happy with the cook on your baked eggs, remove from the oven and devour with crusty bread!
My version isn’t a patch on Rachel Khoo’s but I did try hard and they were certainly moreish!
Let me know how your baked eggs go…
Until next time,
Mrs T x